Joining the military is one of the most honorable choices a person can make, but it’s not always the easiest thing to deal with as the parent of a future or current service member. You may have complicated feelings, especially if your child is going into the military straight after high school.

While we may not be able to ease all of your concerns, we’ve created a guide to help you determine what you can expect when your child joins the military. Below, you’ll learn about the process of joining and some tips for coping with the transition.

What You Can Expect When Your Child Starts the Process of Joining the U.S. Military

If your child has expressed interest in a military career, you may have a lot of questions, especially if you have no service members in your family you can reach out to with your questions. You may even have some conflicted emotions about your child joining the military, but it’s normal as a parent to want success and security for your children.

What can help alleviate some of the unknown and stress is getting familiar with the process of joining the military and what your child will likely experience as they start their career. Below are some of the general steps you can look forward to as you help your young warrior kickstart their career in the U.S. military.

Picking a Branch and Career

The first thing your child will do is pick a branch of the U.S. military and decide between active duty or the Reserves or Guard. Another factor to consider is what kind of jobs or occupations are available in each branch. These are important decisions that will impact the trajectory of their military career, so offering your help and support is important.

One of the best ways to do this is to help them find information about the different aspects of joining, which includes training opportunities, employment benefits, career options, lifestyle, and more. You can find a lot of this information online or talk to recruiters in your area to learn more so you can help inform your child.

A great way to learn the most about the military and the different branches is to talk to former and current service members. These individuals have hands-on experience and can give you a clear picture of what your child can expect, which will help you adjust to the

Choosing Between Enlisted or Officer

Once your child has decided on the branch they want to join, they will need to choose whether they want to enlist or become a commissioned officer. If your child chooses to enlist, they will need to visit a Military Entrance Processing Station (MEPS) that’s closest to them. If your child hasn’t taken it already, they’ll take the Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery (ASVAB) at MEPS, undergo a background check, and take a physical examination.

The ASVAB is a test that measures the capabilities of an individual and aims to predict the future success of potential service members in the military. This test will help recruiters match individuals with careers in the military, and the better you do on the test, the more opportunities you may have.

If your child wants to become a commissioned officer, they’ll need to be aware that this comes with more responsibility than enlisting in the military. Your child will also need a college degree and more training before they can start their career as a commissioned officer. Some colleges also have an ROTC program that allows you to train for future service in the military. Once you graduate, you will have your degree and receive a commission. Talk to your child to see if this is a potential option if they want to be a commissioned officer and receive some military training while in school.

Meeting Eligibility Requirements

Joining the military requires you to meet certain eligibility requirements, which vary slightly between the branches. For all branches, a person will need to be at least 18 to join or 17 with a parent’s permission. Your child will also need a high school diploma or GED unless they are trying to become a commissioned officer, which requires a four-year degree. Your child will also need to take the ASVAB and meet the score requirements for their chosen branch and occupation, which means plenty of studying and practice exams.

Taking the Oath and Training

After finishing the enlistment process, your child will need to take the oath and head off to training. Recruits will take the Oath of Enlistment while cadets will take the Oath of Office. Many parents feel emotional during these moments since it marks the start of their child’s military career, and you may want to spend time with your child before they take the steps to start their career.

If your child has chosen the enlistment path, they will leave for basic training, which can last anywhere between 7 to 10 weeks until they graduate. Those who chose the officer path will start their college education so they can get the training they need to be successful in their military career.

Post-Graduation and Career Development

After graduation, your enlisted child may move on to receive additional training based on their career choice. These trainings help with career development and help your child become equipped to handle the challenges of their work. If your child is in college, they will graduate with a four-year degree and start their career as an officer.

Tips for Coping With Your Child Joining the Military

Joining the military is an honorable career choice, but it’s not always easy for the parents of the service members. Concerns for their child’s safety, dealing with their child moving somewhere new, and having less contact than ever before can be challenging, but there are ways to cope with this change. Some of the best tips we have for parents dealing with their child joining the military include:

1. Take the Time to Learn About the Military

If you’re not familiar with the military, it can be overwhelming to hear that your child wants a career in the military, especially if you have specific ideas of what the career entails. Rather than let yourself overthink or be consumed by anxiety, take some time to learn about the military and what a career in the service actually looks like.

You can find information from active duty and veterans about what it’s like to serve, and recruiters can also answer questions you may have. The information you have can also help you teach your child about the military and the different opportunities, which can help them make the right choice for the future.

2. Make Connections With Other Military Parents

Connecting with other military parents can help you deal with the challenges of having a child in the military. These parents can act like a support group and guide you if you’re dealing with difficult emotions or feelings.

You can even ask these parents questions if you’re confused or need some clarification, especially when your child is away at basic and may not be able to contact you often. You may even be surprised to learn that some people from your community and circle have children or other family members who are or were in the military. Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.

3. Release Control

Every parent eventually has to deal with the change in their role as a parent and that they no longer have the same control as they used to. While you’re always going to be a parent, you’ll have to adjust to your child being out of the house and starting their own adult life.

Rather than resisting these changes, lean into them instead. Let your child know that you have the confidence in them to perform one of the toughest jobs in the nation and that you’re proud to have raised a courageous and passionate person.

Keep in mind that adjusting to these changes won’t happen overnight. It will take some time to adjust and to pivot your life to focus more on yourself than what your child is doing every day, especially if you now have an empty nest. Be patient with yourself and don’t be afraid to express your feelings, whether you’re talking to a friend, family member, or another parent, or writing your feelings on paper.

4. Give Yourself Permission to Feel

You may have a lot of complicated feelings about your child moving away from home and joining the military, and that’s okay. Give yourself permission to feel whatever you’re feeling and look for healthy ways to cope with these emotions, such as journaling, spending time with loved ones, or creative hobbies. Just remember that it’s not productive to sit with these feelings and do nothing about them. It’s important to work through your emotions and move forward so you can continue to support your child during this big transition in their lives.

5. Find a New Purpose

As a parent, one of your primary purposes is to raise and nurture your child. While this doesn’t necessarily stop once your little one leaves the nest, you’ll have a lot more time on your hands. You should look into establishing a new purpose, whether that’s rekindling an old hobby or trying something new that you never had the chance to do before.

You can even find a new purpose related to the military to show your support for your child. For example, you can donate to nonprofits, volunteer for veteran organizations, or even start your own nonprofit or event that supports our troops.

Find High-Quality Gear for Your Military Child at MLC

While it may not completely ease your anxiety and the complicated emotions you feel about your child joining the military, equipping them with high-quality gear can help you rest easier knowing they’re well-supported on their journey.

Military Luggage Company is here to help with our selection of high-quality gear for service members, including backpacks, duffles, rucksacks, kit bags, and so much more. We pride ourselves on providing service members with gear they can trust in some of their toughest operations. Help your child gear up for their new career by browsing our complete selection, or contact us today with any questions!